just accept me for me
I'm finally back to blogging. I figured I would miss some days. Despite my ability to force others to do the things they know they should - I'm much worse at forcing myself. But that's true for most people. We are very quick to forgive ourselves for things that we would NEVER excuse from someone else.
I really like the new Discover card commercials, the "we treat you how you treat you" thing. It's what we all want - we want others to understand where we are coming from. To understand WHY we did that. Surely if they knew the reasons behind our mistake, they would forgive it.
We all have our friends that do that for us. In fact, that's part of what makes someone our BEST friend - simply because they are willing to look past our horrible flaws and mistakes and still like us, defend us, and claim that we rock! But also, they call us out and tell us when we are stupid. And because of the trust we have with them - we accept it...from them. That person in the office that barely knows you who said the same exact thing....well, they had it coming.
I try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. I try to trust that they are well intentioned and that even when they do something ridiculous - it made sense to them in that moment. In fact, I would say that often, if we were in the same setting as them, under the same circumstances, we might do something similar. But I think we all have certain things that we find inexcusable.
Our "pet peeves." Things that we think a decent person would never do. When we encounter these moments, all of our kindness and understanding seems to evaporate and suddenly we hate that person with a passion.
I think that God is similar in some ways. But much better than us. If he were in the same situation he would NOT do what we did. He would still do the right thing. Yet despite the fact that he would NEVER do what we did, he still forgives us for it. All of our sin is like a pet peeve for God. He absolutely despises it. And yet, he forgives us. He doesn't excuse our sin because he know he would've done the same thing. He excuses our sin because he loves us so much that he died for it.
When you get to know someone - you begin to figure out the things they don't like about you. And if you really care about that person, you will probably start to change. Marriage is a great picture of this. There are always things you discover you really don't like about the person you married and you are not afraid to let them know.
In a bad marriage - nothing changes. You say to yourself, I've always been like this and my friends accept me - why can't my spouse. Well...your friends don't live with you. If they did, they would probably also hate you. Also, your friends are probably the same gender with equally low standards on the subject. Also also, they probably aren't planning to spend their whole life with you. This whole thought that the perfect spouse would just accept me for me is crap. You are a flawed person, of course you need to change.
In a good marriage you WANT to change. You say to yourself, if I can change this habit it will make my spouse happy. I would rather suffer a little and change for their happiness, then avoid suffering for my own happiness. And in the end you are both much much happier. And you become better people.
God is a great friend - the best. Even though we do terrible things - he died for us. Even though we spit on him and mock him, he still chooses to love us. God has given us a whole book on ways we can make him happy. He's not saying he won't love us anymore if we don't do them - simply that it would make him VERY happy if we would. And it will make us better people.
You can choose to not change. Eventually you'll probably want a divorce since God can't "accept you for you." You'll walk away from the relationship and find someone that makes you happy. Like sex. Or Drugs. Or money. Or power. You know - one of those idols. Of course, they will require you to change as well - and in the end you'll never really be happy.
Or you can decide you WANT to change. You want to make God happy. You are thankful for him and cherish him. Your relationship with him is more important than the things he wants you to give up.
You might not change all at once. But he will see that you are trying. He will stick with you. He will help you. He will sacrifice for you. He's not going to care if the progress is slow. He's not going to care how long it takes. He already chose you. He already died for you. He just wants you to love him too.
I really like the new Discover card commercials, the "we treat you how you treat you" thing. It's what we all want - we want others to understand where we are coming from. To understand WHY we did that. Surely if they knew the reasons behind our mistake, they would forgive it.
We all have our friends that do that for us. In fact, that's part of what makes someone our BEST friend - simply because they are willing to look past our horrible flaws and mistakes and still like us, defend us, and claim that we rock! But also, they call us out and tell us when we are stupid. And because of the trust we have with them - we accept it...from them. That person in the office that barely knows you who said the same exact thing....well, they had it coming.
I try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. I try to trust that they are well intentioned and that even when they do something ridiculous - it made sense to them in that moment. In fact, I would say that often, if we were in the same setting as them, under the same circumstances, we might do something similar. But I think we all have certain things that we find inexcusable.
Our "pet peeves." Things that we think a decent person would never do. When we encounter these moments, all of our kindness and understanding seems to evaporate and suddenly we hate that person with a passion.
I think that God is similar in some ways. But much better than us. If he were in the same situation he would NOT do what we did. He would still do the right thing. Yet despite the fact that he would NEVER do what we did, he still forgives us for it. All of our sin is like a pet peeve for God. He absolutely despises it. And yet, he forgives us. He doesn't excuse our sin because he know he would've done the same thing. He excuses our sin because he loves us so much that he died for it.
When you get to know someone - you begin to figure out the things they don't like about you. And if you really care about that person, you will probably start to change. Marriage is a great picture of this. There are always things you discover you really don't like about the person you married and you are not afraid to let them know.
In a bad marriage - nothing changes. You say to yourself, I've always been like this and my friends accept me - why can't my spouse. Well...your friends don't live with you. If they did, they would probably also hate you. Also, your friends are probably the same gender with equally low standards on the subject. Also also, they probably aren't planning to spend their whole life with you. This whole thought that the perfect spouse would just accept me for me is crap. You are a flawed person, of course you need to change.
In a good marriage you WANT to change. You say to yourself, if I can change this habit it will make my spouse happy. I would rather suffer a little and change for their happiness, then avoid suffering for my own happiness. And in the end you are both much much happier. And you become better people.
God is a great friend - the best. Even though we do terrible things - he died for us. Even though we spit on him and mock him, he still chooses to love us. God has given us a whole book on ways we can make him happy. He's not saying he won't love us anymore if we don't do them - simply that it would make him VERY happy if we would. And it will make us better people.
You can choose to not change. Eventually you'll probably want a divorce since God can't "accept you for you." You'll walk away from the relationship and find someone that makes you happy. Like sex. Or Drugs. Or money. Or power. You know - one of those idols. Of course, they will require you to change as well - and in the end you'll never really be happy.
Or you can decide you WANT to change. You want to make God happy. You are thankful for him and cherish him. Your relationship with him is more important than the things he wants you to give up.
You might not change all at once. But he will see that you are trying. He will stick with you. He will help you. He will sacrifice for you. He's not going to care if the progress is slow. He's not going to care how long it takes. He already chose you. He already died for you. He just wants you to love him too.
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