A Prayer

Father,

I am ashamed of how often I am self-obsessed.

I am sorry that I have warped a world that is made to point to you -- into my own personal kingdom.

I am embarrassed that rather then first considering others, I consider myself.

I am disgusted with my tendency to obsess with the concerns of the material world.

I have claimed credit to your great works.

I have been praised in your stead.

I have raised myself up instead of falling down.

Father, it is obvious that I have missed You.

I have missed, ignored, doubted, and re-formed your simple words.

I have missed the point of it all.

I have claimed you, but not followed you.

I have waived your banner on a flag pole that I drag sheepishly behind myself.

I have spoken your words without knowing their weight.

Lord, I doubt you.

Lord, I ignore you.

Lord, I fight you.

I call you 'Lord', but I come before you with arrogance and pride.

I call you 'Lord', but I place your words below my own.

I call you 'Lord', but I treat you as an advisor, court jester, and servant.

I use you at my convenience and expect you to bend to my demands.

God, how small do I paint you?

I have contained the creator of the universe in a lamp.

I carry you as a trinket, I use you like a good luck charm.

Holy Spirit, I have left no room for you to dwell in my heart.

Christ, you poured your blood for me, but I will not sweat for you.

Christ, you clean the feet of others, but I turn my back.

Christ, you humbled yourself to die my death, but I mock your sacrifice.

Jesus, how I must delight in your suffering.

Father, I confess, I have abused your name.  

I have proclaimed you as my Master and Lord.  

I have proclaimed you as my Father and Friend.  

I have proclaimed you as my Foundation and Purpose.  

But I have not lived it.

You have brought yourself Glory.  

You have used my sin for your Good.  

You have worked all things to the purpose of your will.

I have pursued my own pleasure.

And even as I confess to you...

Am I broken?

Am I willing to change?

Is this a turning point?

Are these empty words?

How often God have I cried out, "SIN!"?

I claim the sin.

But do I repent?

I identify my pride.

But does it break me?

I confess my rebellion.

But do I become obedient?

Father, I am useless and worthless.  

Who would keep a pen that splatters ink?

Who would use a sword that cuts its wielder?

Who would dwell in a home that crumbles?

You are a God who is full of Grace.

You are the Master of all things.

The Creator of all things.

The Sustainer of all things.

I am your creation.

I pray Lord that I would realize that you are big and I am small.

I pray Father that I would be obedient.

I pray Jesus that I would be humbled by your sacrifice.

I pray Holy Spirit that my heart would be a shining temple. 

I am unable to properly repent.

I can do nothing without you Lord.

So use me.

Guide me.

Mold me.

May I find satisfaction in you God.

May my purpose be you God.

May I start the day thinking about you God.

May I end the day thanking you God.

May I live the day for you God.

May I be joyful knowing that it is all Your's.

May I be joyful knowing that all things work for your good.

May I be joyful knowing that you are with me always.

Thank you providing yourself Lord.

May I realize that I need nothing else.

May I live knowing I need nothing else.

May my purpose be nothing else.

Lord Jesus, hear my prayers.

I am sinful, but you have made me pure.

Speak on my behalf.

Change me to become like you.

I pray all these things in your Holy Name.

AMEN!